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Welcome to another edition of the 1% Habits Newsletter!

This is where you’ll get up-to-date information on small wins to improve your habits, productivity, and life satisfaction. 

Let’s get to it.

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📈 How to Stop Feeling Like You’re Falling Behind

Halloween is officially over.

The decorations are packed away. The candy wrappers are everywhere. And last night, after the kids went to bed, my wife and I sat on the couch — tired, happy, and a little guilty.

She said, “I feel like we didn’t do enough this year.”

And I knew exactly what she meant.

Even though we went to both school parades, carved pumpkins, and walked the neighborhood while the kids trick‑or‑treated, there was still this quiet feeling that maybe we could have done more — more decorations, more activities, more “memories.”

It’s a feeling I’ve noticed at the end of almost every season.

Summer ends, and I think about the trips we didn’t take.
 Christmas passes, and I wonder if we soaked up enough of the magic.
 Even birthdays come and go with a faint sense of “Did we make it special enough?”

It’s that subtle, familiar tug of FOMO — the fear of missing out.

In a world where every moment can be shared, posted, and compared, it’s easy to feel like you’re not doing enough — not living enough — not experiencing enough.

But lately, I’ve been thinking about a counter‑argument to that mindset.

It’s called The Reverse Bucket List.

What Is a Reverse Bucket List?

Most of us know what a bucket list is — a list of things we want to do before we die. It’s about future experiences, goals, and dreams.

A reverse bucket list, on the other hand, flips that idea.

Instead of focusing on what you haven’t done yet, it’s a list of everything you’ve already done — the moments, experiences, and accomplishments that have shaped your life so far.

It’s a gratitude exercise disguised as reflection.

The goal isn’t to stop dreaming or striving — it’s to pause and appreciate how much life you’ve already lived.

Because when you’re constantly chasing the next thing, it’s easy to forget how much you’ve already experienced.

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Why We Struggle to Feel “Satisfied”

There’s a psychological reason why we often feel like we haven’t done enough. It’s called hedonic adaptation — the tendency for humans to quickly return to a baseline level of happiness after positive or exciting experiences.

You get the promotion, buy the new car, take the dream vacation — and for a while, it feels amazing. But soon, your brain adjusts. The new normal becomes… normal.

Then you start looking for the next thing.

Researchers like Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky and Dr. Ed Diener have studied this extensively. Their findings show that while external achievements can boost happiness temporarily, gratitude and reflection have a more lasting impact on well‑being.

One study published in the Journal of Positive Psychology found that participants who wrote about things they were grateful for each week reported higher levels of happiness and lower levels of depression compared to those who focused on hassles or neutral events (Emmons & McCullough, 2003).

In another study, researchers discovered that reflecting on past positive experiences can actually increase life satisfaction and resilience (Bryant, 2003).

In other words: looking back with appreciation isn’t indulgent — it’s healthy.

The Social Media Effect

Of course, it’s harder than ever to feel content when you’re constantly seeing curated highlight reels of other people’s lives.

Even if you had a great Halloween, someone on Instagram probably had a “better” one — more decorations, more themed snacks, more perfectly staged family photos.

Social media amplifies comparison. It makes ordinary moments feel inadequate.

But here’s the truth: you don’t need more experiences — you need more awareness of the ones you’ve already had.

That’s where the Reverse Bucket List comes in.

It’s a way to ground yourself in gratitude instead of comparison.

How to Create Your Reverse Bucket List

You don’t need a fancy journal or a special app. All you need is a quiet moment and something to write with.

Here’s a simple process you can follow:

Step 1: Set the Scene

Find a calm space — maybe with a cup of coffee or tea — and give yourself 20–30 minutes.

This isn’t a “task.” It’s a reflection — a conversation with your past self.

Step 2: Look Back Over the Years

Start with broad life categories:

● Family and relationships

● Career and education

● Travel and experiences

● Personal growth

● Moments of courage or kindness

● Challenges you’ve overcome

Then, write down anything that comes to mind — big or small.

It could be “graduated college,” “became a parent,” “ran a 5K,” or even “learned to cook a new recipe.”

The point isn’t to impress anyone — it’s to remember.

Step 3: Reflect on the Meaning

For each item, ask yourself:

● Why does this matter to me?

● What did I learn from it?

● How did it change me?

This step transforms your list from a collection of events into a story of growth.

Step 4: Add the Quiet Wins

Don’t just include the big milestones. Add the small, quiet victories too — the ones that rarely make it to social media.

Like the time you stayed calm during a stressful moment. Or when you helped someone without expecting anything in return.

These are the building blocks of a meaningful life.

Step 5: Revisit It Regularly

Once you’ve made your Reverse Bucket List, revisit it every few months — especially when you feel like you’re “falling behind.”

It’s a powerful reminder that you’ve already done so much more than you give yourself credit for.

My Own Reverse Bucket List Moment

After that Halloween conversation with my wife, I decided to try this exercise myself.

I started jotting down things from the past year — moments I’d almost forgotten:

● Helping coach my son’s cross-country team to 2nd place in the state championship meet

● Taking a family trip to Canada.

● Launching an AI-based music project (read it about it here.)

● Reading bedtime stories every night (even when I was tired).

● Watching my son learn to ride his bike.

As I wrote, something shifted.

I realized that the “we didn’t do enough” feeling wasn’t about reality — it was about perception.

We’d done plenty. We’d made memories. We’d been present.

But because I hadn’t paused to appreciate those moments, my brain defaulted to scarcity — to the illusion that life is always missing something.

The Reverse Bucket List broke that illusion.

It reminded me that our life is already full — not perfect, but deeply full.

The Science of Gratitude

There’s a reason this works. Gratitude rewires the brain.

According to research from Dr. Robert Emmons at UC Davis, practicing gratitude activates the brain’s reward system, increasing dopamine and serotonin — the same neurotransmitters associated with happiness and well‑being.

In one study, participants who wrote gratitude letters showed measurable changes in brain activity related to empathy and moral judgment, even weeks later (Wong et al., 2018).

In short: gratitude creates lasting psychological benefits — and the Reverse Bucket List is one of the most natural ways to practice it.

The Reverse Bucket List as a Family Practice

This isn’t just a personal exercise — it’s a great family ritual, too.

Imagine sitting down at the end of each season with your spouse or kids and asking:

● What were your favorite moments this month?

● What made you laugh the most?

● What are you proud of?

You can even make it visual — print photos, write notes, or create a “memory jar.”

Over time, you’ll build a living record of gratitude — a reminder that your life is already full of moments worth celebrating.

And when the next holiday or season ends, instead of guilt, you’ll feel appreciation.

A Simple Action Plan

If you want to try this yourself, here’s a quick roadmap:

1. Choose Your Moment. Pick a quiet evening — maybe this weekend — to sit down and reflect.

2. Write Freely. List everything that comes to mind from the past year or two. Don’t overthink it.

3. Highlight the Meaningful. Circle the items that truly matter to you — the ones that make you smile or feel proud.

4. Share It. If you’re comfortable, share a few items with someone you love. Gratitude is contagious.

5. Revisit Monthly or Seasonally. Set a reminder to update your list regularly. It’s a simple but powerful way to stay grounded.

And if you want a tangible tool to help with this, the Time Management & Productivity Printable includes reflection prompts that fit perfectly for a Reverse Bucket List session.

Final Thoughts on Reverse Bucket List

When my wife and I talked about Halloween, what we were really expressing wasn’t guilt — it was gratitude in disguise.

We wanted to hold onto the joy a little longer. We wanted to make sure we didn’t take it for granted.

That’s the beauty of the Reverse Bucket List. It turns that quiet ache — that fear of missing out — into appreciation for what’s already here.

So before you rush into the next season, take a moment to look back.

Write down what you’ve already done, what you’ve already experienced, and who you’ve already become.

You might be surprised by how much life you’ve already lived.

And when you see it on paper, you’ll realize something powerful:

You’re not behind.

You’re already enough.

Talk soon,

Steve

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